Thursday, 2 July 2015

That clear blue stick

This is the story of how it all started.

After one month of getting married, i started noticing that i was breaking out a lot, i was feeling very tired and sleepy all the time. It just feels like my energy is drained out of body and i was feeling super lazy not wanting to do anything and my husband was obviously not very happy about it lol. At first i thought maybe i was still tired from all the wedding stuff that i had to go through until i notice that i am one week late for my period.

'That's it, i am doing a pregnancy test' i told myself. 

I went to the drugstore and bought the most accurate (according to my friend, even Che Ta uses this brand she said lol) pregnancy test kit and brought it home. I was so anxious and drank a lot of water before i went to bed that night. I woke up at five am that morning to pee and decided to do the test. 

I can still remember how nervous i was waiting for the results to pop up on the screen and was reciting selawat the whole time. Few minutess or maybe seconds later, it's stated clearly on the screen the word i will never forget "pregnant, 2-3 weeks".

I was shaking and in complete shock. Whoaa, i mean.... Subhanallah, this soon? Alhamdulillah, we're fertile! hehe. My husband was outstation that day and initially i wanted to surprise him but i just couldn't keep the news to my self anymore and told him the happy news. I should've wait because i couldn't witness his first reaction but he was very happy with the news and that's enough for me.

Alhamdulillah, yay!

Wednesday, 3 June 2015

Lost my mojo

Wow, the last time i wrote here was over a year ago. I guess i just could not find my blogging mojo last year.

Life has turned 360 degrees for me. I got married in February this year to my childhood friend. We've known each other for almost eighteen year. I remember feeling so scared that i might end up alone and not finding someone to spend the rest of my life with. It's crazy what can happen in a year and the changes that you're gonna have to go through. I think when it comes to finding the one, when you know, you know and when the time comes, you'll embrace it. No need to worry to much about it :)

We were also surprised with a great news this year. We're expecting our first baby and they're twins, Alhamdulillah therefore the main reason i'm blogging again is because i have always wanted to document my pregnancy journey. I contemplated to write at the beginning but i guess if i don't write it down i won't have a written memories of this beautiful journey.

i hope this writing mojo stays throughout the pregnancy and mommyhood. Too ambitious but not impossible ;p

May Allah ease everything, InshaAllah :)
I am gonna write about my first trimester experience in the next post, InshaAllah.

Saturday, 24 August 2013

Post Raya Guilt.


First of all, I would like to welcome all of you, my (imaginary) readers to the post-raya-guilt-let's-eat-salad-everyday bandwagon! It's really amusing scrolling down instagram now seeing lot's of people posting greens as their meal, including *cough* myself. Haha bunch of hypocrites :p

I don't know how long this 'eat clean' thing will last for me, not planning to be too ambitious considering few failed attempts before but hey, i now know how to make yummy salads! At least i love my greens now and can finish a whole big bowl of it and not coming for another session of nasi campur later.  

I realise now, the reason i hate my salads before was because they're were boring and plain. Salads doesn't have to be plain and boring. I tried incorporating few of my favourite ingredients into my salads and the results turned out great, at least great for my liking.

I used butterhead lettuce and err romaine i think, and a whole plum for this salad.

I love salmon, so i throw some in and make poached egg to add the creaminess to the salad. Egg and salmon is such a good combo! The dressing for this salad is also so simple, one teaspoon of cream cheese, sour cream and mayonnaise each, sprinkle some pepper and dried parsley, a splash of hot water to thin out the gravy and you're good to go!


It's really fun experimenting with ingredients and flavours. I love simple meal like this, no fuss in the kitchen, less cleaning, healthy, and delicious! WIN.

Till then,

Monday, 19 August 2013

Aidilfitri 2013


Dear Blog and (imaginary) readers, 

I think it's not too late to wish Selamat Hari Raya to you. Well, I think we missed May, June and July but nevermind, I'm here now *smooch*

This year's Eid has been as awesome as previous Eid. I had a great time with everyone in my big family. Alhamdulillah, everyone in the family are blessed with abundance of good foods, peaceful and comfortable place to celebrate this beautiful day. 

Thank You, Allah for such a lovely experience and it just makes me sad thinking that somehow, somewhere in the world, our brothers and sisters might not be able to enjoy things that most of us have, so Alhamdulillah for all the good things in life.

Bits and pieces of Aidilfitri this year.

While we're in this spirit of Hari Raya, let's not forget our brothers and sisters in Egypt, Palestine, Syiria and all over the world. May Allah accept all those death fi sabilillah in Egypt, Palestine, Syiria and all over the world as Martyrs. Ameen

Till then, Bye

Sunday, 21 April 2013

Reclaim Your Heart

I can still remember the first time reading sister Yasmin Mogahed's article two years ago (i even blog about it here) and i was impressed at how her writing have affected me till today. 

I learnt a lot about the concept of love and attachments, about tawakkul, about what really matters in life and what's not. I learnt that we are more than just human beings, we are a mind, a soul, a servant of Allah and our love for Allah should be above all things. 

It is through her writing too, I learnt that women should never be on display and our value is too high to be reduced to an object. I learnt that Allah swt loves us too much that He orders us, women to cover ourself.

I see the beauty of Islam, through her writings and talks. May Allah grant her the highest rank in Jannah, may Allah inspires her and grant her more knowledge and strength to continue giving dakwah.

Light upon light presented Yasmin Mogahed live in Malaysia, and Alhamdulillah I was among the lucky ones to attend the talk. 

It was a full house that night. 

Sister Yasmin Mogahed began with the story of Prophet Adam AS. How evil refuse to prostrate to Adam AS out of arrogance and was thrown out from Jannah forever. The same happened to Adam AS, he was thrown out from Jannah too but because he was humble and he repented, Allah swt forgive him and make him a leader to the mankind.

Prophet Yunus story. The du'a lailahailla anta subhanaka inni kuntu minazzolimin (There is none worthy of Worship besides You, You are far exalted and above all weaknesses, Surely, I’ am from among the wrongdoers) when he was trapped in the belly of the Nun fish.

Our external situation will not change if we don't change our internal.

I find the story of Prophet Musa the most inspiring story ever. He was born in the era of Pharoah, the tyrant that was killing newborn boy babies. At that crucial time, Allah swt inspires mother of Musa to place him in a basket in the Nile river. Allah swt was actually giving a lesson to mother of Musa, He wants her to put her ultimate trust in Him.

You know, when you let go something for the sake of Allah, He will replace it with something a lot better for us. Allah swt will never leave people who trust Him. 

Prophet Ibrahim is the epitomy of tawheed. He was the Khalilullah (a friend of Allah). His journey of finding the true god was so admirable. From his story we learn that no matter how impressive a creation, it will always set. But Allah doesn't. Allah is always there and He is close, closer than our jugular veins.

Prophet Ibrahim's story is also about slaughtering our attachments. Our attachments to human beings, to  our money, to our jobs, to all this worldly means. 

When you're enslaving yourself to Allah swt, you're actually freeing yourself.

The more you run after the creation, the more it runs away from you. The more you're dependent on a creation, the more they'll let you down, but Subhanallah, the more needy you are of Allah, the more Allah comes to you. 

So, so amazing!

You don't get the love of a creation by running after a creation, you get the 'real' love of a creation by running towards Allah, the Rahman and the Rahim.

And lastly, her words from the talk that I love the most,

When you love the giver more than the gift, then you'll be gifted. 

This is just a tiny weeny fraction of the content of her talk and I am truly sorry if the information that I conveyed is wrong or misinterpreted. Please do not take this as it is, do some reading on your own as well as this is only my personal note from the talk.

May Allah open our hearts and our minds to continue seeking and receiving knowledge, InshaAllah.